Sunday, October 08, 2006

Concerning Haiku

today's post is rather different from most, as I would like all comments to be posted as Haiku - for the culturally challenged, haiku is a form of Japanese poetry that has a specific rhythmic pattern (google it). For purposes of uniformity, I have decided that we will stick to the common five syllable, seven syllable, five syllable meter.
Here's the piece that inspired me
We thrash, curse for air
As our strangler declares, look
How violent the Arab
Zein El-Amine
While I can only hope to some day achieve the poignancy of the above poem, for now, here are some of my own - Hmm - a few on Ramadaan, and a few on life. Enjoy

Aphrodisiac
Which we break fast with daily
Nafs, hard to control

Shoulder to shoulder
Please switch off cellular phones
Allahu Akbar

Chaos, cruelty
Men Fighting for survival
Free Palestine Now

caramel goodness
Also cleans stains from toilet
Life does tastes good, coke

Procrastination
Boredom, and insomnia
Solution, MXIT

30 comments:

M Junaid said...

on second thought - my initial blog filter was a bit rigid - so you can leav a normal comment as long as you have a Haiku accompanying it.

blogging, waste of time
cuts down time for ibadaat
Hell fire awaits me

:)

!Joe! said...

The boy drew buildings
He drew no pictures for her
Sad girl stands alone

ok it's lame, but it's a start...

Shoulder to shoulder's cool, captures so much in 17 syllables.
Also liked the haiku on Coke...:)

speak no EVIL! said...

sweet blog come visit mine

!Joe! said...

laughter and applause-
the people love her so much
the star of the show

hehe, now that's my kinda haiku...;)

qdee said...

my silver sunshine
he dances in my twilight
wake me tomorrow

qdee said...

the boy drew buildings
his profound stupidity
sad girl finds love
:)

orange boy in shop
hiding under the table
in a green turban :)

qdee said...

wai are yu hai ding
i am miss ing yu so much
wen will i see you

i cant stop blogging
i need to go to rehab
dude its all you fault

qdee said...

i mean. 'your'
and joe, i miss you. visit my blog

!Joe! said...

Again, this is why you people are my bestest best friends...:)
Q, I love your orange boy in shop haiku!!!!Can't stop laughing, and it's hard to laugh on an empty stomach...ooh also liked your take on my one ;) oh and your rehab one, lol.
MJ you crazy mofo:) love you guys, sniff...

bibi-aisha said...

searching for something
its there, just need to find it
in my crazy mind


gosh! this is pathetic! havnt written a haiku since , hmm... primary school..nah! mayb high school. so forgive the lame attempt

bibi-aisha said...

he asks she declines
she drowns in shallow water
he floats in limbo

junaid-pls disable word identification. its annoyin!

bibi-aisha said...

internet addict
staring mindlessly at screen
achieving nothing

cant rem who said- this is addictive. like pringles- once u pop u cant stop

where did the time go?was meant to write article-deadline tmrw, instead i found myself watching youtube, checking forums, listening to altrnative nasheeds & chatting to my sis in UK. & penning lame haikus

ciao

M Junaid said...

Ok BB - yeah . it is annoying - security measures like this are as helpful as having your goldfish watch over your car.

I like your second haiku - first one wasnt that bad ;p

nomad in sand land
finding it hard to turn back
to a place called home

Anonymous said...

Leave, thoughts untouched
Shelter within the heart
love denies me

---lame so lame---
but thats me hehe o n da fact dat i'm a bit down---
come save me dear friend from myself!!!

Anonymous said...

No happy thoughts lie within me now mwah

bibi-aisha said...

in cool defiance
she lowers her veil gently
her eyes define her

bibi-aisha said...

cold pain within him
nurturing his desire
die for your freedom

junaid, look what you've started! i had haikus running thru my head all night but i seem to have forgotten them. & they were good. i do say so myself! oh well. genius is often a result of insomnia

bibi-aisha said...

nomad in sand land
embracing home in her dreams
await my presence

nomad in sand land
dreading impending shackles
of walls and alarms


nomad in sand land
living independently
in complete safety

nomad in sand land
craving tarkari and rice
and a lekker braai

ok, ok, im stopping!bad bb, no more haiku for u (",)

!Joe! said...

we are all losers
need boyfriends/girlfriends/a life
live not for this blog.

Anonymous said...

I Came, thought
you'd be here, left
Unanswered Alone

M Junaid said...

well. this piece is for my dear friend - i love fighting with you probably as much as you love washing dishes

King Soloman said
love the finer things in life
but dont miss prayer

It matters not if
the Herd was silenced that day
the essence not lost

umbeleleko uluse - (thats Bembe btw)

sweet and gorgeous jo
resting in my heart always
here lies dramaqueen

saaleha said...

some haiku thoughts while on the plane to Kimberly:


To Kimberly I
fly in a sardine's tin can,
holes and diamonds don't.
--

E-mail aquaintances
on mxit evolved thumbs tap
missives of misses.
--

yes, i like that guy,
like you like that other girl
weird how we choose them.
--

haiku sucks like a
bad ho, too quick syllable,
i love you short time.
--


er yeah, some of them are downright weird, bad and unsavoury. lets just say fasting and high altitudes do not a good mix make.

M Junaid said...

empty, growling pit
till sunset heralds, craving
sweet apple lagan

M Junaid said...

MJAD Stands for this:
mahomed Junaid Adores:
hmmm. its a secret...

qdee said...

a secret everybody knows

M Junaid said...

whats the point of having secrets if everyones gonna know about it :( i need a new secret now - something big - like the coke formula - although i'd probably end up telling you about it QD :P

M Junaid said...

stupid MJ Khan,
silly girl, facade wears thin
stuck in the present

M Junaid said...

paddling without oar
hope, discarded in water
was hard, letting go

lips trailing, flashes
flesh tingling, shut out the light
lost in the moment

typing yuck schedule
damn stupid comittee work
i yearn for my bed

venom in your words
i'm feeling used, thrown away
gold chocolate coin

can you love a friend
when you cannot define, friend
nay, i am deceived

distant smile, questions
rebound, recluse or regret
surely Allah Knows Best

I'm walking away
cant bear to look back at you
love, an illusion


huge cockroach scuttling
foot snuffs chance of family
Allah we return

too young to be hurt
too smart, too witty, too dumb
too stubborn, too blind

jack and Jill went up
to fetch a pail of water
tripped, clumsy bastard!

these haiku's are sad
mj is pretty sleepy
look at time of post

!Joe! said...

too many comments
get tired of reading them
but still i visit

!Joe! said...

mj dear mj
friendship's a good thing, you know
grab it with both hands :)

mj dear mj
a sweet, mood-enhancing drug
on which we're all high :)