Thursday, April 16, 2009

Concerning Greatness

You know how I know im Gay? Because the best thing to come out of blogging so far has been my friendship with Waseem :)
Happy Birthday Great One - im going to starve from now so that I can enjoy the supper later. I'm typing this from an Internet cafe and I had about twelve minutes to put it together so it might not be as consistent as I pictured it would sound in my mind - but as you guys probably know by now - i dont care :)

The inspiration is from Dr Seuss's Green Eggs and Ham

Do you like
sanha stamped lamb?
I do not like it, Sanha Man.
I do not like
Sanha stamped lamb.

Would you like it
At Suhoor?

I would not like it
at Suhoor.

Would you like it
with Kajoor?

I would not like it with kajoor
I do not like
sanha stamped lamb.
I do not like it, sanha man

Would you like it with rice?
Would you like it with spice?

I do not like it
with rice.
I do not like it
with spice.
I do not like it
at Suhoor.
I do not like it
with kajoor
I do not like
sanha stamped lamb.
I do not like it,
sanha man.

Would you eat it
in a curry?
Would you eat it
in a hurry?

Not in a curry.
Not in a hurry.
Not with rice.
Not with spice.
I would not eat it at suhoor
I would not eat it with kajoor.
I would not eat sanha stamped lamb.
I do not like it, Sanha Man.

Would you? Could you? When on ghush?
Eat it! Eat it! In a rush.

Its more halaal than N.I.H.T.
Its more halaal than MJC

I would not, could not when on ghush.
Not more halaal! You let me be.

I do not like it in a curry.
I do not like it in a hurry.
I do not like it served with rice.
I do not like it served with spice.
I do not like it for suhoor.
I do not like it with kajoor.
I do not like sanha stamped lamb.
I do not like it, Sanha Man.

You do not like it. So you say.
Try it! Try it! And you may.
Try it and you may, I say.
Try it on top of a braai
Try it after a naai

Im trying to watch the FA Cup,
So I will try it to shut you up.
Say! I like Sanha Stamped Lamb!
I do! I like it Sanha Man!
So I will eat it with a curry.
And I will eat it in a hurry.
And I will eat it with some rice.
And I will eat it with some spice.
And I will eat it at suhoor.
Say! I will eat it with kajoor!
I do so like!
Sanha Stamped lamb
Thank you!

Thank you, Sanha Man!
MJ

Monday, April 06, 2009

Concerning Joan

So this is probably the most nonsensical parody I have done and its completely spur of the moment (well, like ninety percent of my blogs). Dont ask me where I got the idea from. I'm going to dedicate this one to Jeremy James and Nafisa (the birthday peeps) and to the Great One for his awesome parody two years ago :D


If God had a bouquet, what would it be
And would you order pay per view
If you were faced with a heavy bill
What would you watch if you had just one option

And yeah yeah TVs is great yeah yeah TVs good
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God owned Multichoice
Would he give us greater choice
Would we have a bigger Voice
Trying to make him some dough

If God owned DSTV what would it look like
And would you want to see
If seeing meant that you would not get MTV
Or things like wrestling and queer eye and the simpsons and all the porno

And yeah yeah TV is great yeah yeah TVs good
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God owned Multichoice
Would he give us greater choice
Would we have a bigger Voice
Trying to make him some dough

He's trying to make him some dough
Destroyin ETV all alone
Not even Nimrod can atone
Except for Deborah Pattas nine thirty show

Original Lyrics by Joan Osbourne

MJ


Friday, April 03, 2009

Concerning Pets

I BOUGHT A HAMSTER!

I dont know why I did it - im not usually an animal person, but I saw it in the pet store and I had to have it. I cant believe how much joy this little rat is bringing me :) Mum was extremely hesitant at first... and it did take two days of convincing before she let me keep it. I think what convinced her though was seeing the kids play with it. Damn Grandkids always get away with more than I can.

Came home yesterday and found Abdullah, Zahraa and Muhammed Azam huddled in a corner - I figured they were just busy scheming and meditating - you know - working out new places to leave their bicycles so that we trip over them, thinking about which game saves they can delete from my ps2 memory card - usual stuff like that. Turns out they had my hamster in their hands and they were taking turns in feeding it chocolate cake! He wasnt complaining though - although all that sugar did make him extra hyper.

Pity he didnt bite them. Maybe next time.

Im getting another hamster in a few weeks - dont want the little guy getting bored when im at work. The only problem is that I havent come up with a name for it yet - so im going to leave the floor open. I was thinking of calling him Dub... which is short for Dabbatul Ardh ( Beast from the Earth) Basically - I want him to have a scary sounding name - like a dragon or something. Any suggestions?

MJ


Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Concerning Effervescents

I wanted to blog tonight but i'm feeling sick ( I dont mean sick in the 'watching baby seals being clubbed to death' sick, but fluey sick) Its weird really as MJ never gets sick. Mum thinks its because im stretching myself too thinly - between research commitments, lecturing and the shop - oh yeah - I took the Unisa position today as well - not the smartest decision i made but hey - ive made worse.

Because of the flu/cold/ general yuckiness I had to give away my cricket ticket - I had a box seat that was given to me by Coke (well, ABI... and you wonder why I dont boycott the guys :) I was looking forward to this match since last year - but as it draws closer - I find myself not caring anymore. Maybe i'm over my 'live cricket' phase. I dont know.

I'm really into Chuck though :) Its such an awesome tv series. I think Killa was going on about it lately - glad I started following.

MY PS3 doesnt play avi files off my flashdrive.. and I think that sucks. But not as much as Land Invasion in Zimbabwe.

Ive been trying to O.D on this Corenza C thing since yesterday - it doesnt work. I dont even think it tries. But I love giving things a second chance, so i'l try one now. I like how it fizzles... which is perhaps an indication of it healing properties. Then again - Shifa Kajoor is overrated... but we arent allowed to say that.

This post makes no sense. I think those flutex are kicking in :)

Come to think about it - baby seals are overrated too.

Crocodiles FTW!